"Me and my heart we got issues
don´t know if I should hate you or miss you
Damn I wish that I could resist you
can´t decide if I should stab you or kiss you"
don´t know if I should hate you or miss you
Damn I wish that I could resist you
can´t decide if I should stab you or kiss you"
It's 'him' again. OMG...this lyric really describe the thing going on inside the h.e.a.r.t now. Can't resist but wanna resist. DAMN!!! Anyhow, rather than 'fighting' I think it will be better if I just follow the flow and if it's meant to disappear, it will, if not, well I don't know what is the proper action to be taken. Depends la..
Today was an unlucky day for me. At the church this morning, the lucky numbers were drawn to won the grand prize and consolation prizes. Sadly & unfortunately, my numbers were the unlucky ones and I went home empty handed. It's okay..there will be next time. These are my unlucky number...ciss....:
*****************************
(The names of our beloved departed souls)
Later in the afternoon, we went to my aunt's house at the end of the village *very isolated place*. Nice house surrounded by nature, if only the weather is as cool as Ranau region, I will surely fall in love with that place. We went there to pray for our departed relatives' soul. They are: Grandpa, Grandma, Uncle and Adrian (my late brother). Besides that, this is a chance for the family of my mother to gather together but I wasn't in a mood to socialize and mingle around. So I just sat there and read a book like this:
Such an anti-social I must be in their eyes. Who cares...I was always like that actually. Some time ago, a friend of mine (kenalan baru--lelaki) told me that he thinks that I am a lonely person and he should date me..wah suka hati jak!! I didn't agree with him at that time & he failed to date me haha...but actually, I am a lonely person. I've got no close friends here in kampung. *sigh* I don't know why I am being an anti-social here. I miss the days at UKM. I've met crazy bunch of people there and I really like them a lot. I miss them a lot..Things are different here. I need to slowly be friends with them and hopefully I'll have some new friends here. *them refering to that group of people..actually, I have some friends also but from a different group...I'm not THAT anti-social ba...* Wait...refering myself as anti-social is damn a crime o..felt sorry for myself..it's not anti-social ba..I think it's more likely that I am a very quiet & shy person. People can't get close to me that easy. Maybe I should open up a bit la...and maybe be friendlier. I hope I'll find courage to do that. Finding myself to be so lonely made me asked God for a boyfriend..*desperate? Oh no!* but I was joking! Being lonely isn't that bad. When I'm lonely, I will be a very good observer & listener. I'll fully utilize my eyesight & hearing. I kinda like to be alone, but not all time..I feel like I still wanna enjoy the status that I'm having now, that's why God's gift *the MAN* is still pending. When will it be delivered? We'll see...
Tomorrow, school will reopen. I am still with the afternoon session so I have no worries no wake up early for morning rush..but I am a bit worried about what's gonna happen tomorrow. Never mind, I'll prepare mentally for everything! I'll do my best..after all, Jesus is with me!
Hoping for a great day tomorrow...(^_^)v
_clare_
Today was an unlucky day for me. At the church this morning, the lucky numbers were drawn to won the grand prize and consolation prizes. Sadly & unfortunately, my numbers were the unlucky ones and I went home empty handed. It's okay..there will be next time. These are my unlucky number...ciss....:
*****************************
(The names of our beloved departed souls)
Such an anti-social I must be in their eyes. Who cares...I was always like that actually. Some time ago, a friend of mine (kenalan baru--lelaki) told me that he thinks that I am a lonely person and he should date me..wah suka hati jak!! I didn't agree with him at that time & he failed to date me haha...but actually, I am a lonely person. I've got no close friends here in kampung. *sigh* I don't know why I am being an anti-social here. I miss the days at UKM. I've met crazy bunch of people there and I really like them a lot. I miss them a lot..Things are different here. I need to slowly be friends with them and hopefully I'll have some new friends here. *them refering to that group of people..actually, I have some friends also but from a different group...I'm not THAT anti-social ba...* Wait...refering myself as anti-social is damn a crime o..felt sorry for myself..it's not anti-social ba..I think it's more likely that I am a very quiet & shy person. People can't get close to me that easy. Maybe I should open up a bit la...and maybe be friendlier. I hope I'll find courage to do that. Finding myself to be so lonely made me asked God for a boyfriend..*desperate? Oh no!* but I was joking! Being lonely isn't that bad. When I'm lonely, I will be a very good observer & listener. I'll fully utilize my eyesight & hearing. I kinda like to be alone, but not all time..I feel like I still wanna enjoy the status that I'm having now, that's why God's gift *the MAN* is still pending. When will it be delivered? We'll see...Tomorrow, school will reopen. I am still with the afternoon session so I have no worries no wake up early for morning rush..but I am a bit worried about what's gonna happen tomorrow. Never mind, I'll prepare mentally for everything! I'll do my best..after all, Jesus is with me!
Hoping for a great day tomorrow...(^_^)v
_clare_
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